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Other verses: Mary and the Booger Tree | My Faith

“At the Theater.” 

A SILLY VERSE

By Charles Moon

Jacob Mallory
up in the gallery
was eating peanuts and chips,
and cold, crunchy celery.

A harlequin hippo
named Bertram de Bippo
acted on stage
by the light of his zippo.

Mrs. Martha Ann Gumms
held programs with thumbs
like an umbrella raised up
to catch Jacob’s crumbs.

Though the play was delightful
and somewhat insightful
the noise from above
made the audience frightful.

Jacob chewed
as Bertram spewed.
Martha decided
he was exceedingly rude.

She asked her friend Ruben
a beach dwelling Cuban
to go up to the gallery
and take Jacob’s food bin.

Ruben politely
grabbed Jacob’s box tightly
and created a scene
Martha considered unsightly.

Jacob protested
and rudely suggested
if he didn’t let go,
he’d have Ruben arrested.

The man from Havana’s
most exclusive cabanas
took Jacob’s snack
and Jacob out back.
Next time at the theater
he’ll be eating bananas.

End.

Other verses: My Faith | At the Theater

ANOTHER SILLY VERSE

By Charles Moon

Mary Willy moved to Philly
With her brother Tom and cousin Billy.
They found a house near Fairmont Park
With a porch, a swing, a butler “Clark”
And a big old oak with peeling bark
That dripped out sap when it was chilly.

The boys and girls from up the block
Had said the tree was fun to mock.
So after school on chilly days
And in the humid summer haze
They’d invent a nasty phrase
and taunt the oak ‘til five o’clock.

At ten past five when work was done
Mary chased them from their fun.
All, that is, for a boy named Lucas
Who said the tree was dripping mucous
And all those boogers tend to spook us.
He laughed and ran as if he’d won.

Mary vowed she’d stop their joking
And all the taunts she found provoking.
She planned a scheme devised to teach
Lucas’ friends the proper speech
Around an oak, or even beech
And return to them a proper soaking.

With the help of neighbor Bobby Sanchez
Mary climbed up in the branches
She didn’t wave or call hello
But dropped a bowl of gooey Jello
Upon the coat of the nasty fellow
And giggled while his pallor blanches.

Lucas cried and jumped and spun
The other children were outdone.
Mary was the tree’s defense.
With booger goo and common sense
And Jello costing fifty cents
She made Lucas scream and run.

Lucas never came back taunting
And spent the days, his own house haunting.
The other children learned their lesson
That trees need love and lot’s of blessin’
and with Mary, they’re not messin’.
Since then the tree was never wanting.

In winter under branches spreading
The tree saw Mary’s friends go sledding
‘ Neath the oak in scenes bucolic
They would play and spin and frolic
Except that year she had the colic.
It’s even where she held her wedding.

The years flew by for tree and Mary
Her children grew so fast it’s scary.
The booger oak got old and frail.
It lost its branches to wind and hail
And Mary’s pleas were no avail
To the city men who were quite wary.

The tree was sick from prick’ly crown
To the trunk she used to dance aroun’.
The gardener tried to nurse it well
With food and love and magic spell
But the mighty oak had said farewell
so in the fall they chopped it down.

Mary Willy moved from Philly
To a place that didn’t get as chilly
With sprouting acorns in her pocket
And pointed leaf in golden locket.
Where oaks had stood, an empty socket
And in its place, there grew a lily.

Mary’s daughter, Mary Leigh
Planted acorns, one-two-three
In the meadow where the children go.
Now twenty dripping oak trees grow
And say what you already know,
That Mary loved her booger tree.

End.

Other verses: Mary and the Booger Tree | At the Theater

By Charles Moon

End.

©2005 Charles Moon. All rights reserved.